cast
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Janine Duvitski
Jacqueline Stewart / Jacqueline
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Jake Canuso
Mateo
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Tim Healy
Les / Lesley
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Tony Maudsley
Kenneth
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Adam Gillen
Liam
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Sherrie Hewson
Joyce
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Sheila Reid
Madge Harvey / Madge
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Siobhan Finneran
Janice Garvey / Janice
- Oliver Stokes Michael Garvey / Michael
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Steve Pemberton
Mick Garvey / Mick
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Kenny Ireland
Donald
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Paul Bazely
Troy
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Hugh Sachs
Gavin
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Johnny Vegas
Geoff Maltby / Geoff - The Oracle
- Shelley Longworth Sam
- Danny Walters Tiger / Tiger Dyke
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Crissy Rock
Janey / Janey York
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Julie Graham
Sheron / Sheron Dawson
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Steve Edge
Billy
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Bobby Knutt
Eddie
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Elsie Kelly
Noreen / Noreen / Doreen
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Nicholas Burns
Martin Weedon / Martin
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Josh Bolt
Rob / Rob Dawson
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Abigail Cruttenden
Kate Weedon
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Geoffrey Hutchings
Mel Harvey
- Hannah Hobley Chantelle Garvey
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Margi Clarke
- Kate Fitzgerald Loretta
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Nathan Bryon
Joey Ellis / Joey
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Robin Askwith
Gary Snelling / Gary / Marcus
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John Challis
Monty
- Selina Griffiths Pauline
- Nathaniel Walker Coolio Garvey
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Sheridan Smith
Brandy
- Leon Bainbridge Coolio Garvey
- Zane Bainbridge Coolio Garvey
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Perry Benson
Clive
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Honor Kneafsey
Jodie
- Asa Elliott Himself
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Julian Moore-Cook
Callum
- Michelle Butterly Trudy
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Hannah Waddingham
Tonya
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Alan David
Glynn
- Nathan Byron Joey
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Jessica Ellerby
Amber
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Kathryn Drysdale
Natalie
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Bel Powley
Bianca
- Charlotte Eaton Terri
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Paul Chan
Mr. Wu
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Michael Fenton Stevens
Sir Henry
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Joan Collins
Crystal Hennessy-Vass
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Shane Richie
Sammy Valentino
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Simon Greenall
Neville
- Laila Zaidi Cyd
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Matthew Kelly
Cyril Babcock
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Gareth Hale
Dennis
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Norman Pace
Nigel
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Nigel Havers
Stanley Keen
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Louis Emerick
Norman the Doorman
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Amanda Barrie
Psychic Sue
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Alice Barlow
Annie
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Milanka Brooks
Ionela
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Mark Heap
Malcolm
- Bobby Crush Billy Sparkle
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Ian Lindsay
Mr Dixon
- Alba Ortega Carmen
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Javier Marzan
Passport control officer / Passport Control Officer
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Geoffrey McGivern
Beverley Westwood
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Philip Olivier
Jason
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Holly Earl
Elena
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Leslie Jordan
Buck A. Roo
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Derren Litten
Elvis
- Nadia Sawalha Melanie
- Simon Ruston Meatloaf Tribute
- Jonathan Hawkins Motown Jonathan
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Antonio de la Cruz
Vladimir
-
Alex Childs
Caroline
-
Gary Oliver
Franco
-
Wendy Richard
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Niky Wardley
-
Cilla Black
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Ian Reddington
Jimmy Neptune
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Siobhan Redmond
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David Bradley
-
Shaun Dooley
-
Una Stubbs
-
Kate O'Mara
-
Frances Barber
Daisy
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Kevin Bishop
The Original Peter Andre
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Michael Starke
Dodgy Dave
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Barry Chuckle
The Great Crostini's Great Assistant.
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Paul Chuckle
The Great Crostini
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Layton Williams
Larry
-
Elliott Jordan
Jack
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Dhafer L'Abidine
Mohammed
-
Ken Morley
Herbert
- John Nicholson Karaoke Singer
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Bruce Mackinnon
Jonty
- Gary George Himself
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Alice Barry
Maureen
-
Antonio Gil
Casino Barman
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Janet Street-Porter
Reporter
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Elena Saurel
Spa Receptionist
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Rustie Lee
Queenie
- Ian Krankie Pepe
- Janette Tough Agnes
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Colin Hoult
Dirk
- Neil McCaul Jan De Groot
- Jalleh Alizadeh Nicole
- David Avila Airport Official
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Harriet Webb
Tracey
-
Denise Black
Gloria
-
Martin Marquez
Juan the Vet
- Txema Perez Lorenzo
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Loles León
Dolores
-
Ruth Madoc
Riannon
- Caroline Riva Pianist
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Joe Ferrara
Policeman
- Liam Shaw Salvador
-
Joseph Balderrama
Dr. Bueno
- Lesley Anne Cawood Meatloaf Tribute
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Roy Hudd
Maurice
-
Paul Bentall
Evelyn Pyke
-
Manal El-Feitury
Catalina
-
Stephen Marcus
José Luis
-
Angus Deayton
Grenville Titcombe
-
Gerald Kyd
Julio
- Milo McCabe Policeman
-
Oliver Maltman
Peter Andre Tribute
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Danny Scheinmann
Dr. Lugo
- Marc Marcus Lionel Richie Tribute
- Agustín Navarro Mayor of Benidorm (Himself)
- Jofre Alsina Coach Driver
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Phil Dunster
Ryan
-
Aykut Hilmi
Jose
-
Harman Singh
Punter
-
Toby Williams
Wolfgang
-
Nicholas Boulton
Beltoro Receptionist
- George Shelley Giles
-
Uri Geller
Himself
-
Sarah Baxendale
Jenny
-
Hemi Yeroham
Shifty
-
Jason Manford
André
-
David O'Reilly
Bean
-
Joséphine Berry
Marie Lavoie
- Luca Chiarva Faustino
-
Martyn Ford
Hercules
-
Chris Rogers
Eczema the Clown
- Charlie Bird Baby Jesus
-
Stuart Milligan
Rutger
-
Tony Hadley
Himself
- Gina Fillingham Lucy
- David O'Kelly Bean
- Carol Decker Herself
- Barry Green Mad Munk Morris
- Jamie Noar Delivery man
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Apple Brook
Mrs. Cattleprod
-
Daniel Garcia
Airport Security Officer
- Graeme Hawley Simon Superfan
- Rochelle Hamilton Girl at Booth
- Philip Pope Winter Smallcock
-
Bobby Ball
Ron Pickford
-
James Lance
Angelo
-
Claire Sweeney
Maxine
-
Holly Johnson
Himself
-
David Cann
Maitre D'
