episodes
- 1. White Mages are Jerks The best defense is a crappy offense.
- 2. Mega Man Needs To Go To be the number 1 robot, you need a place to go number 2.
- 3. Mortal Kombat Friendship The greatest thing one friend can do for another is not murder him.
- 4. Lifeguard Mario No holding down B in the pool area.
- 5. The Mario Bros. Go Halfsies Sharing is caring. Unfortunately, caring won't help you much in videogames.
- 6. Mortal Kombat Pervert Every ninja's dream: two girls at the same time.
- 7. Mario Paint Torture Don't even get him started on Creed.
- 8. Excitebike Shop Overheating is radical.
- 9. Double Dragon Girlfriend 8 bit blood is thicker than 8 bit water.
- 10. Castlevania S&M It's hard to beat a boss when he's into it.
- 11. Angry Birds Friendship Angry birds and pigs have a lot in common. For example, neither can fly for some reason.
- 12. Sonic's Gambling Problem What happens in Casino Night Zone stays in Casino Night Zone.
- 13. Resident Evil Roommate This is what happens when you find a roommate on Craigslist in Raccoon City.
- 14. Crashing the Silent Protagonist Party He was the least and most annoying bandicoot at the party.
- 15. White Mage Dad is Racist Guess who's being randomly encountered for dinner.
- 16. The Koopa King's Speech He's a t-t-t-t-terrifying ruler.
- 17. Metal Gear Solid Box Trouble
- 18. Rejected Sega Intros He'd be a great voiceover artist if he didn't have to read or talk.
- 19. Everybody Hates Crono They'll do anything to save him. As long as it's not too much work.
- 20. King Hippo Disgraces Hippo People
- 21. Cammy's Dad (Street Fighter) If she's going to street fight, she'd better do it like a proper lady.
- 22. Chargin' Chuck Gets Picked Last He's game ready. And really, really desperate.
- 23. The Horrible Secret Behind Starter Pokemon This is almost as cruel as keeping them in a tiny ball.
- 24. Kazooie is Kidnapped Living in a backpack is the least of her worries.
- 25. Final Fantasy Cover Bard We'd use the sprites from Final Fantasy 1, but he doesn't do originals.
- 26. The Mushroom King "Thank you, father! But our respectable suitor is in another castle.
- 27. Robotnik Breaks Down Never buy a pre-owned drillcar.
- 28. Ken Gets Excited He's a master of the "Hadouken" and "Waistband" technique.
- 29. Doodle Jump Fall The higher they jump, the farther they fall. And fall. And fall.
- 30. Link's Death Our heart containers go out to his family.
- 31. Ice Climbers Cliffhanger He had his whole extra life ahead of him.
- 32. Mario's Horrifying Discovery What happens in the warp zone, stays in the warp zone.
- 33. Rampage Apology Forgive and forget. Unless they just punched through a skyscraper.
- 34. Mario With A Portal Gun The shortest distance between two objects is a straight line. Or a portal.
- 35. Ecco's Friends Are Stupid Dolphins They say dolphins are only slightly less intelligent than humans. And humans are pretty dumb.
- 36. Donkey Kong Doesn't Back Down You shouldn't run away from your problems, especially if you can beat them in a fight.
- 37. Sheik Crashes a Bachelor Party You don't need the tri-force of wisdom to realize this won't turn out well.
- 38. Noob Saibot is a Noob He's gonna kick your ass. Right after he reads the move-list.
- 39. Angry Birds vs. Tiny Wings Imitation is the sincerest form of ornithology.
- 40. How Blinky Died He's got a few ghost skeletons in his closet.
- 41. Mario Goes Down The Wrong Pipe No free coins. No extra lives. The only way out is the reset button.
- 42. Mortal Kombat Sitcom They're going to kill you....
- 43. Captain America Uses Drugs He's as American as apple pie injected with super steroids.
- 44. Starcraft SCVs Go On Strike Not enough minerals? MINE THEM YOURSELF.
- 45. The Diablo Townspeople Should Move You'd be amazed at how much living next to Hell will affect your property value.
- 46. Kung Lao's Hat is Dull The only thing worse than having your head chopped off is having your head mostly chopped off.
- 47. Mario Meets With His Agent He'll take you to the next level for just 10% of your coins.
- 48. Sim City Monster Hates Your City I think we can all agree that gridlock is the real monster here.
- 49. Contra Henchman Strategy They're not the best strategists, but they'll run at you like nobody's business.
- 50. Mario Dumps Pauline "It's not you, it's me....and the fact that you're not a princess.
- 51. Plants vs. Zombies Wall-nut Gets Bitten Teamwork is infectious.
- 52. If Classic Games Had DLC Back in my day, fireflowers were only a nickel.
- 53. Link to the Past with a Portal Gun When life gives you the Triforce, make Triforce grenades.
- 54. Sonic Meets With His Agent The fastest thing alive meets the smoothest talker alive.
- 55. Falco Adjusts His Attitude "Gee, I've been saved by therapy. How swell.
- 56. Ghosts 'n Goblins Blacksmith
- 57. Inbred Yoshi His face has a lot of character. Horrible, deformed character.
- 58. Koopa Troopa Does Stand-up Comedy Even seasoned comedians occasionally bob-omb.
- 59. Samus Meets With Her Agent Behind every great woman there's an awful man trying to get her in a bikini.
- 60. Mega Man With a Portal Gun Dr. Wily wants him gone.
- 61. Sonic Wasn't Fast Enough Speed runs save lives.
- 62. Dr. Light's Gift to Mega Man X It's better to give than to receive a terrible present.
- 63. Mortal Kombat Sitcom: Shao Kahn Comes to Dinner
- 64. Chill Penguin is Chill He's not big on using shotgun ice, but he's always down to shotgun Natty Ice.
- 65. Tifa Embarrasses Barret It's not the size of your gun arm that counts, it's how you use it.
- 66. Tails Can't Die One fox, two tails, unlimited lives.
- 67. Smash Bros. Fatalities The ESRB may have to reevaluate their rating.
- 68. Mega Man X Charges Too Much If at first you don't succeed, destroy everything.
- 69. Judgmental Mortal Kombat Nothing's more dangerous than stereotyping. Except maybe Goro.
- 70. A Boy and his Blob Reunion You don't need jelly beans to transform into a productive member of society.
- 71. Luigi Wears Red Imitation is the sincerest form of douchebaggery.
- 72. Captain Falcon Can't Get Insurance That's the last time he'll drive while eating Falcon Lunch.
- 73. Diddy Kong Country Player 2 has Player 1 aspirations.
- 74. NBA Lockout Jam The only dunking he's doing involves cookies and milk.
- 75. Bahamut Wants to Hang Out You will rue the day you summoned him.
- 76. Mistaken Hero Identities
- 77. Mario's Mushroom Mix-up Doubling in size instantly is bad for your health.
- 78. NES Ninja Turtles Theme Song These Dorkly boys don't cut em' no slack.
- 79. Robotnik Finally Wins This isn't the game over he asked for.
- 80. Mario is a Furry If you wear a raccoon tail long enough, people are gonna get the wrong idea.
- 81. The Frogger Menace "We have nothing to fear but fear itself. And gigantic, car-sized frogs.
- 82. Bastion Narrator Invades Other Games Initializing raspy voice mode...
- 83. Vision Wants to be in the Avengers Movie You've got to draw the line somewhere. Preferably behind the badass laser robot.
- 84. Double Dragon Dad It's called tough love. Very, very tough love.
- 86. Chrono Trigger Time Travel Mix-Up Don't cross the (time) streams.
- 87. Mario Responds to PETA No animals were harmed in the making of the Tanooki suit.
- 88. Link's Yard Sale Nothing like a little Spring inventory cleaning.
- 89. Gordon Freeman Meets With His Agent "Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out with your shrill, horrible voice.
- 90. Boos Man Up Night of the living dread.
- 91. Spy Hunter Pranksters Never trust the guy in the van.
- 92. How Diablo Destroyed Tristram
- 93. Pac-Man Plays Skyrim Psh, you can talk to your family anytime.
- 94. QWOP Guy Has Sex It's all in the limbs.
- 95. The Night Before Mario's Christmas Not a creature was stirring, not even a Mouser.
- 96. It's a Wonderful Extra Life A toast to Luigi: The richest Player 2 in town.