cast
- Dicken Ashworth Darren
-
Norman Lovett
Norman
-
Mary Riggans
Spider (voice)
- Leon Sinden Horse (voice)
- Sara Corper Una
-
Geoffrey Hughes
Dirk (voice) / Dirk (voice) / Addison Mammon
- Johnny Meres Postman
-
Bernard Cribbins
Snowman (voice)
- Ian Sexon Letter Box (voice)
-
Claire Nielson
Mrs. Lovett
-
Sean Scanlan
Mr. Lovett
-
Kenny Ireland
Psychiatrist
- Pene Herman-Smith Lady in Street
- James Ryland Doctor
-
Stephen Yardley
Sergeant
-
Iain McColl
Policeman
- Jean Faulds Old Woman
-
Derek Lord
Thuggish Man
-
Jean Alexander
Elsie Mittens
- Duncan Goodhew Self
- Annette Staines TV Presenter
- Yonnie Fraser Girl at Party
- Robert Richmond Mr. Green
- Bruce Morton Poseur at Party
-
Stuart McQuarrie
Black Cloud (voice)
- Louise Beattie Melanie
- Tom McGovern Tommy Farenheit
- Victoria Hardcastle Nina
- Vivienne Dixon 2nd Attractive Woman
-
Juliet Cadzow
1st Attractive Woman
- Liz Ostler 3rd Attractive Woman
-
Jonathan Watson
Pillar Box (voice)
-
John Bett
Sir Timothy
-
Lee Cornes
Bingley
-
John Sparkes
Roger
-
Mark McDonnell
Postman
-
Arnold Brown
Vicar
-
Sarah Collier
Jennie Bruce
- Andy Gray Pig (voice)
- David McNiven Old Man
- Suzanne Bonnar Pet Shop Lady
- Lilla Scott Female Presenter
- Andrew Dallmeyer Judge
- James Earl Adair Male Presenter
-
Paul Young
Matted Lump (voice)